Wednesday, July 16, 2008

I was on a trampoline all weekend

That's not a metaphor. I really was.

My sister swiped her neighbor's, and so while my mom was here this weekend, I jumped on a trampoline. As did Brody. Well, he preferred to sit while someone else made it bouncy.

I don't remember the last time I was on a trampoline, but I'm pretty sure Ronald Reagan was president. I wonder if Ronald Reagan ever thought his Vice President's idiot son would ever be president.

But I digress.

Tonight, Jeremy, Brody and I had a belly flop/back flop contest on our bed.

Brody won.

However, I got the most giggles from Brody when I jumped into the air first, and then flopped onto the bed, instead of just falling over onto the bed.

My thoughts over the last two days:

Someone should market lemonade that has caffeine in it. Not the still lemonade but the carbonated lemonade. I may just crumble some excedrin into my next bottle and see how it tastes.

Also, instead of water with vitamins, or coconut or other flavoring, I think there should be Ibuprofen water, or Excedrin water. Is someone working on this? I think it would sell a lot. If they can make lollipops with morphine in them, I think they can figure this out.

Also, when I go out to my favorite Indian restaurant (Namaste) for the buffet lunch on a self-indulgent whim (this is one of my favorite activities I have pledged to do more of), I think that restaurant should clear out all children so I can read my book in peace.

Also, I think if you ever go to a buffet restaurant, especially one at which I am dining, you should not be able to have your 4 children cut into line in front of me on the buffet and take the last naan bread. Because even if the waiter will refill the naan soon, it still makes me angry.

5 comments:

SaRaH said...

morphine lollypops? where can i get this marriage of perfectness?

Christine said...

These lollipops were made for cancer patients - hence, the need for a prescription. Or you could probably buy them illegally through the internets. . .

Kristin said...

WOW, morphine lollypops sound quite good right now, LOL! :P

Yaaa for trampolines!

Jess said...

lmao. morphine lollipops, excederin water. I need them both.

Where can i buy stock in those once they hit the shelves?

Robyn said...

I think I can buy morphine lollipops from one of my students.... LOL

And, um, kids? Get the fuck out of my naan.